Third Time Around

The morning is foggier than I expected. When I last ran this marathon two years ago the weather was sunny and beach music provided its up-tempo and relaxing melodies, the perfect combination for running. Today all I see is gray with oil derricks on the east side of the Pacific Coast Highway on my right.

I run the first mile in 6:10, a little faster than my desired 6:30 pace. The course is better than before. In 2007 we hit the only hills about two-thirds through the race. We also merged with the half-marathoners about halfway through the course. This kept me from getting any water since the slower runners clogged the water stations. This year the hills are before 10 miles and we run on opposite sides of the road from the half-marathoners.

Past the hills I'm running ahead of a 6:30 pace. The field is about 1,900 runners, about twice as large as in 2007. I'm running alone, which doesn't help me maintain a pace. Through 13 miles I'm still ahead of schedule, which surprises me in one sense. When I train I can barely hold my target pace for a few miles, but when I race its effortless, at least for a while.

One element that is not going well is my race fueling. I've taken a couple of the Cliff Shot Blocks and am feeling a bit nauseous. I keep making excuses to not eat any more. "Just one more mile." "After the next water stop." "When I get out of this pack of runners," which is ridiculous since there's no one around me.

The 16th mile takes us north on the beach. We pass RVs and surfers, but I have to focus because we're hitting a slight headwind. At this point my running mechanics are faltering and the added resistance is making each step more difficult. I keep pushing, knowing that the wind will be at my back in a few miles, but I don't see the lead runners so the turnaround must be a long way ahead.

When I reach the end and turn around, I welcome the assistance of the wind, but every part of my body below the waist hurts. It's now 20 miles and I'm still on a 6:30 pace. My feet hurt, so I try to soften my steps. But I can't do it because that would require absorbing more of the impact with my thighs, which are tight and sore. I can't take lighter steps, landing more on my forefoot, because my ankles hurt.

I'm running out of gas, so I take whatever electrolyte drink they're giving along the course. Fortunately my stomach doesn't react poorly to the solution. I'm just not strong enough to keep up the pace. I slow considerably, even with the tailwind. Every change in elevation, no matter how small, is painful. The last stage of the race returns us from the beach to the Pacific Coast Highway. I can't wait for the race to end. Two guys pass me down the homestretch. My last sprint to the finish line gets me to the end in 2:53:34. My pace over the last 6.2 miles was 7:30, a full minute slower than over the first 20.

I finish 13th out of 1,977, fourth in my age group (M40-44). It's the third time in a row that I've run a marathon in 2:53. This seems to be one distance that I'm destined to not improve upon.

The race features a unique surboard finishers medal. On top of that I received a large medal and nice jacket for finishing the third leg of the California Deraming Race series. Of the three races Long Beach International was my favorite, not taking expenses into consideration. Northern California runners would do best to wake up for the 5:30 AM start for San Francisco and avoid the travel costs for the SoCal races. Between the two Southern California races, the weather is better in Long Beach, but the competition is more difficult.

San Francisco is on my calendar for 2009, and if I ever run Long Beach again, I'll try to do Surf City for the California Dreaming gifts.

If I make any adjustment it will be to run my annual marathon later in the year. Training in the dark is too bleak, and I'd enjoy the speedwork more if I'm running races instead of huffing around Alameda on my own.

PR in '09?

Tomorrow is Super Bowl Sunday and my annual marathon. I race every Super Bowl Sunday to remind me to stay active on this holiday of inactivity. Winter marathons keep me motivated to train in the dark and damp months. I force myself to run most mornings wearing a headlamp and gloves. This year's race is the Surf City Marathon in Huntington Beach. Formerly known as the Pacific Shoreline Marathon a couple of years ago, the marathon's host city has branded itself Surf City, much to the displeasure of Santa Cruz, which has its own surfing heritage. To prove a point, Huntington Beach labels every possible activity Surf City something.

I'm cautiously optimistic about this race, because I emerged relatively healthy from the training. I hope to break 2:50, which would be a PR by three minutes. I use a 12-week program from Runner's World, maxxing out at 55 miles in any week. I averaged about 46 miles a week, and missed only a couple of days because of illness. Last year I reached a maximum of 60 miles a week, and stretched the program out over 14 weeks. I also missed two weeks of training with the flu and averaged two miles less per week than this year.

I was pleasantly surprised how well I performed the race pace workouts that began in early January. The pace was 6:30 per mile, and I was able to do a 4 x 2.5 mile, and 3 x 3 mile. Later I was unable to complete a 2 x 4 mile and a 2 x 3 mile. I rebounded last Saturday with a strong eight mile run at marathon pace, and felt really good about the race tomorrow.

I'll enter the race with two unknowns, which is never a good thing for a marathon. After considering several options, I decided to wear a new pair of my Boston Classic training shoes instead of buying race shoes. I figured that buying shoes for a distance that I only run once a year wasn't worth it, and I didn't feel comfortable wearing my usual race shoes for 26.2 miles. I reduced the weight a bit by cutting the instep portion from the sock liner and using only the forefoot cushion. This leaves me with my orthotics to support the rear of the foot. The other experiment is going with Cliff Shot Blocks, which I haven't used in about year for race fuel. My favorite snacks are Luna Moons because they give me the smallest aftertaste of any race nutritional supplement. Unfortunately the Alameda Bicycle shop where I buy them was out of stock early in the week and I couldn't get back before we left town.

Race prep is generally very good. We're staying at the super nice and expensive Hyatt Regency Resort and Spa, which is just across the street from the race. Maylee went to the expo with me and then played in the beach for a while. The hotel upgraded us to the Governor's Suite, which is so big that we invite Mandy's cousin Yvonne and her family over for dinner. They brought a variety of entrees from the Cheesecake Factory and some cheesecake. Maylee had fun playing with Yvonne and Richard's children, especially Miranda. After the Perez family left, Maylee lost herself in bubbles in the whirlpool bath.

Everyone is fed, clean and relaxed, and we're off to bed.

Personal Bests

2008 was a very good year even though it was the first year that I failed to improve my running. The only legitimate PRs I hit were in two half marathons. Otherwise, I fell back, sometimes significantly and even feared I'd have to quit due to injury. But I was very fortunate, and the good experiences far outnumbered the bad ones. The following are my fondest memories of 2008:

1. I can run!: In the fall of 2007 through the early spring of 2008 I dealt with nagging plantar fasciitis. I don't know Latin, but the plain English description is heel pain that can include a swollen arch. At the Napa Valley Marathon I experienced both with my arch flattening from the ballooning tissue. The last six four miles I gimped home, wondering the extent of any permanent damage I caused. Two days after the marathon my podiatrist, Donald Hegref of San Francisco fitted me for orthotics. He said they would cure my pain. On my return to pick up the orthotics I brought my running shoes to test the orthotics. I was afraid he would frown on my lightweight footwear, but instead he examined a shoe and said, "Cool". His diagnosis was perfect, and If I had gone to him in the fall I could have avoided all the pain.

2. Lake Merritt Joggers and Striders: This all-volunteer group holds monthly runs of 5K, 10K and 15K, and three special races each year. They also manage to record every time and maintain an 0n-line database that goes back 11 years. They also hold a kids race 11 times a year, and to my delight entitle members to a 10% discount at Transports. My participation is limited to races, but for those with more time, LMJS hosts quarterly potlucks with excellent speakers, training runs, and fields several teams for events throughout the year.

3. Harbor Bay Club: I switched gyms in late 2007 for the nearby Harbor Bay Club. I still do the same routines as at the old gym, but Mandy takes yoga classes and Maylee swims like a sea otter. The gym features five treadmills with personal cable TV monitors, permitting me to watch what is usually the only television I can in the morning. The people are friendly and supportive and I get excellent advice from my personal trainer. The morning crowd is a lot of people in my demographic or older, doing a variety of workouts. It's very motivating to me to work out regularly knowing that I'm in good company.

4. Transports Running: Ritchie Boulet is a former all-America runner who in his 30s remains one of the best runners in the Bay Area. He also is the owner of Transports. When I was looking for a replacement for my race shoes, he spent more time than a realtor showing me prospective houses. He went through the trouble of seeking out-of-production models from my favorite brand and calling me with ideas. When I went back to see his suggestions, I noticed that for about 15 minutes he helped a casual runner find a comfortable running shoe. Ritchie ran the mile in four minutes! It was like Babe Ruth giving tips to the St. Catherine's CYO baseball team. Ritchie is married to Magdalena Levy-Boulet, the 2008 Olympic marathon runner, who shares Ritchie's running talent and incredible niceness.

5. Go! St. Louis half marathon: A great big race. Eight-thousand half-marathoners, 2,000 marathoners, and more than 100 four-person marathon teams composed in excess of 10,000 people running around St. Louis. But it felt like 300. Parking is a breeze. There were no lines at the porta-potties. Perhaps most amazing, runners actually lined up according to their pace! Imagine that, a mass of runners that understand that there's no need to crowd the starting line in a chip-timed race. The prizes go five deep in each five-year age group, and are the size of salad plates. If this weren't enough, they also hold a 5K, a kids race and a seniors race the previous day. All the activity was great for Maylee, my mom and me, and definitely worth the trip to visit my parents in St. Louis. Organizer Nancy Lieberman does an amazing job. I only saw her get flustered at the kids race when she admonished parents, including me, to give the kids enough space to run. This one is on my annual calendar.

6. Davis Stampede half marathon: A great little race. This race conflicts with the San Francisco Half Marathon, which I had run twice before. I decided to avoid the parking, city streets and crowds in San Francisco and drive 60 miles east to Davis. My hunch that the travel time was about the same was correct, and parking was easy to find. The post-race party is one of the few that offers food to non-runners, and the items go beyond energy bars and typical packaged foods. Even better, the festivities include a kids jumpy thing. I'll try to do this one in 2010 since I'm running a marathon that day in the coming season.

7. Big River Running: On New Year's Eve 2007 Brigette Schutzman, a cross country and track runner at St. Louis University, was injured in a car accident that left her in a coma for six weeks. Big River helped organize a meet of mile races for different competitive groups, followed by a pasta dinner. The event raised $8,000. I encountered Big River when I visited St. Louis for the Go! half marathon, and was a few fast runners wearing the store's singlets. I went to both locations, finding the first pairs of shorts that I liked in several years. One of the stores has the sentimental location in a house near where my mother and father grew up. Big River is one of the top 50 stores in the country and would be ranked higher here if I lived in St. Louis. Check out their web site. http://www.bigriverrunning.com/. The variety of activities includes speed sessions, running camps, and races.

8. Technical race shirts: The Napa Valley Marathon, Go! St. Louis half marathon, Tilden Tough Ten, San Francisco Marathon, Long Beach half marathon, Primo's Run For Education and the US Half Marathon-San Francisco all provided technical shirts at no additional cost. This seems to be a growing trend and one that I hope sticks as the shirts wear better and will be part of my wardrobe for years to come, much to Mandy's chagrin.

Wishful Thinking

"And here comes Larry Witt (sic) of Alameda!", said Dave Rhody. "I think he's our second masters finisher."

I wish Dave was right, but I was pretty certain that at least three runners ahead of me appeared to be older than 40. It turns out that there were several, including two in their 50s. It was a fairly stacked and well-attended race, and I finished fifth out of 89 in my age group (M40-49), 19th out of 538 overall. A special benefit to me was that my mother, Toni Witte, was in town for Thanksgiving and attended the race. That's her on the left, next to my sister-in-law Kathy Doan who ran the 5K, my brother Martin, and me.

Thus ended my race season of 2008. I had a great year even though I fell short of all my goals. I hoped to win 10 medals, but won nine. If I had run one of three or four races that I avoided because I thought my chances of placing were slim, I would have had 10. Of course, there was also the disaster in Livermore. I also failed to meet my goals of 17:30 in the 5K, 36:00 in the 10K, 1:20 in the half marathon and 2:50 in the marathon.

The above times may always be out of reach, but I am very fortunate. I feared I had seriously injured myself at the Napa Valley Marathon in March, running on a left foot inflamed with plantar fasciitis. But since my podiatrist fitted me for orthotics, my feet haven't been a problem. I was able to run consistently, and my mom got to see me race twice. Maylee ran several kids races and enjoyed riding in the jogging stroller, and joining me for sprints and jumping exercises.

My wife Mandy deserves a lot of credit for being patient and supportive when my runs shift more of the family duties to her in the morning. It takes a village to raise a child, and it takes a lot of people to enable a grown man to act like one.

Now I'm in my winter marathon training phase, which involves a lot of long, dark and cold runs. It's hard to get motivated, but I'm halfway through the program in preparation for the Surf City Marathon on Super Bowl Sunday.

4 X 13.1

The race season is ending and I'm trying to cram in as many as I can after not running a competitive race since early August. October is a great month for races, and the ones I hope to run are all half marathons on consecutive weeks. In running all these races I plan to put in about 30 miles during the week with no speed sessions, then take Saturday off and race on Sunday. I'm curious to see how the reduced mileage and speedwork will mix with the increased long distance racing. How well will my 44-year-old body withstand four straight race weekends?

The first race is the half marathon of the Long Beach International City Marathon, one that I've wanted to do for a couple of years. The last race is the US Half Marathon-San Francisco, which I've run three times. In between is a favorite, the Primo's Half Marathon in Danville-San Ramon, and the Livermore Grape Stomp.

Long Beach: Oct. 12. This was the most beautiful road half marathon I've ever run. The course goes over the waterfront in downtown Long Beach and through the beaches to the south. Other than some early sections around highway access roads and a part over a bridge connecting the port of Long Beach, the route was very appealing. Weather was perfect despite heavy Santa Ana winds the previous day that disappeared on race morning. The course is generally flat with the exception of the bridge. I pushed myself and met my goal of 1:21, running 1:20:45, a 6:10 pace after running the first mile in 5:35. This was my second PR in the half marathon in 2008, partly due to the Brooks T-5 Racer shoes that I bought at Transports in Oakland. I was concerned that the shoes wouldn't give me enough support over 13 miles, but my feet and legs felt fine throughout the race. The only disappointment was finishing fourth in my age group out of 261, just out of the medals.

Long Beach is also the second stop in the California Racing Series. The San Francisco Marathon and its affiliated half marathon that I ran in August is one of the other races, the other being the Surf City Marathon and half in February. I hope to run Surf City and get the medal and jacket for running all three. After the marathon, we spent two days at Disneyland.

Primo's Run for Education: Oct. 19. A cold morning greeted us at a very well run local race. Last year I received three technical shirts from this event. The freebies weren't as plentiful this year, maybe because of the poor economy.

Not long after the start, a woman sped past me listening to an iPod. I chased her and five men, but after three miles they were out of sight. I ran by myself for the remaining 10 miles, a very well-marked course. Not until the 11th mile did I see anyone else, a woman approaching a turn around after I had passed it.

My time was 1:20:53, seventh overall and second in my age group. I checked the results and found that the woman wearing the iPod was Magdalena Levy-Boulet, who represented the United States in the marathon in the Beijing Olympics. I sought her out and found her with her 3-year-old son near the medal stand. She's an incredibly nice person, like her husbank Richie Boulet, who is another outstanding runner and the owner of Transports running stores. I introduced myself to her and asked about her injury, a knee that she banged on a bus handrail in China, which forced her to drop out of the Olympic marathon after three miles. When I told her that I bought my shoes at Transports, she clapped and cheered. She listened politely as I described how she passed me early in the race and I couldn't keep up with her, but I later realized that nothing I said was relevant since I was running at full speed, and she was getting in a comfortable workout.

Magdalena, or Magda is on the right after finishing second in the US Olympic trials. On the right is Blake Russel, who finished third, and Deena Kastor, who was first.

The Primo's race was a tune up for Magda for the New York City Marathon on Nov. 2. She finished 11th overall in New York.

Livermore Grape Stomp: Oct. 26. The third leg of my half marathon trek was the Livermore Grape Stomp. I ran this race in 2005 and wasn’t impressed in the award, which was a ribbon that I quickly bent and threw away. This year’s race fit in my schedule and was intended to give me a good training run before the US Half Marathon the following Sunday. I arrived 45 minutes early to a long line for the pre-registered runners. Those who registered on the day of the race received their bibs and chips instantly while the rest of us waited single file for several minutes. This is an absurdity that some races permit, much like a restaurant immediately seating walk-ins while making those with reservations wait.

A race organizer told me that the race would start 10 minutes late due to the late arrivals. I told her that the long line at the registration table was caused by the inability to process those who preregistered. Then she told me that the race would start at the opposite end of the field from the registration tables. I joined a few hundred runners, none of whom knew the exact starting point, which organizers failed to mark. A few minutes later the woman in charge told us that the race started at the other end of the field where we were originally.

Having returned to the end of the field that I just left, I met up with Brian Collett, who was running the 10K. Brian’s a little faster than me, so I hoped to keep him in sight for a few minutes. As the race began, I chased Brian for the first mile with no one near us. I had the notion that I could win the race. Knowing that some runners might have gotten caught behind slower people at the start, I didn’t get too excited. I figured that If I was in front for two miles I’d have a good chance of winning.

Someone passed me at about a mile and a half, but he split off at the 10K turn, so I maintained my lead. I was running about a 6:05 pace through four miles and opening a lead. I figured I had the race won, with about a quarter mile lead and no one around me. The lack of people turned out to be a problem. I didn’t see any volunteers after the 10K split, and the course was extremely poorly marked with chalkboard chalk arrows on the ground the only guide. After passing the fifth mile I lost the trail. Lost in a subdivision in Livermore, I asked someone walking his dog for directions. He pointed me down the street, but still no arrows.

The race was a complete disappointment. Instead of winning the race, I was now concerned about getting home fast enough to catch a flight in the afternoon. I had no money or cell phone, and there were no pay phones. I found some arrows and followed them past some vinyards, still not certain where I was going.

I continued, still not seeing anyone until I ran for about an hour. There I followed a runner for some race, either the 5K or 10K, and reached the finish, but I think I went through it backwards. My time of 1:10 and change was achieved by skipping untold miles.

I informed the race director of my trouble. Other runners had complaints, and after the director took care of them, she told me that someone had stolen all the signs that marked the course and threw the barricades at Shadow Cliff Park into the lake. It’s a shame, but I said they could have had someone on a bike guiding the lead runner. To her credit she refunded my entrance fee plus a few dollars.

US Half marathon: Nov. 2. “Where do I go?” I yelled as loud as I could after running something like 10 miles, facing backwards, my hands in the air.

Is it really that difficult to properly mark a course? New rule: If race organizers can’t afford the signs, orange cones and volunteers to guide runners through a course, maybe they shouldn’t hold the race. I didn’t see a mile marker after the third mile, and didn’t check my watch for the last 10 miles. Why bother? I had no idea how far I had run.

At the turn around after the Golden Gate Bridge the path loops on a dirt path under the bridge. I spoke to a runner after the race who said that he and several others overshot the turn because the orange cones were stacked and lying flat on the ground.

I’ve run this race four times, and I know the route on the Marin side of the Golden Gate Bridge. I get lost after returning to San Francisco and descending to the shoreline. The course goes left toward the bridge before reversing back towards Fisherman’s Wharf. The confusion is that the half marathon merges with a 10K held at the same time. I passed the first turn and feared I was making the same mistake I did last year when I and a few others ran aimlessly toward Fort Point at the foot of the Golden Gate Bridge. That’s when I turned around and voiced my frustration.

Benjamin Cronin (M30-39) was the only half-marathoner around me, about five seconds back. He was confused like me, and we ran to Fort Point complaining about the course, before he passed me at the turn. I chased him for the rest of the race and finished ninth overall and second in my age group with a time of 1:24.

After the race Ben wondered if we had run more than 13.1 miles. I think we ran the correct distance, but I’m convinced that twice before I did not. In 2006 I completed the race in 1:22, which seems extremely fast, meaning that the course or my route was not a complete half marathon. Last year I ran a 1:25, which I felt was too slow, probably because I ran too far.

At the end of the four half marathons I had two medals and one PR, and one incomplete. I would give myself an ‘A’, a better grade than race organizers. Long Beach gets an ‘A’ and Primo’s a strong ‘B+’. The Grape Stomp served a race before its time and receives an ‘F’ while the US Half did not impress as much as in previous years and gets a ‘C’.

My legs held up well over the four weeks, and my training was very manageable. I ran about 20 miles during the week with no speed work. The races gave me enough running at maximum effort to keep up my speed. If I hadn’t gotten sick in the last week I probably would have run the US Half faster, but I’m happy with the result.

I usually end my season with the US Half, but I’ve won nine medals this year and my goal is 10. The next opportunity is the Academy of Sciences Run Wild 10K in three weeks.

Corporate Challenge

On Wednesday September 17 seven colleagues from work and I were among the 5,693 participants and 259 companies completing in the JP Morgan Chase Corporate Challenge. This year my company, Standard & Poor's, had enough people to form two teams, one male and one coed. Last year Matt Reining, Paul Dyson and I were our only representatives. This year we had as many as 12 individuals who considered running, and with that level of interest the event became more than a few people running and going home. Our office purchased shirts for everyone, and we had an awards ceremony.

The photo above shows most of our team. First Row: Shannon Groff, me, Le Quach. Second Row: Rob Williams, Matt Reining, Paul Dyson, Gabe Petek. Not Pictured: Ian Carroll.

Race night featured near-perfect weather. It was a bit cool, sunny, with a slight wind. The site of the race is Crissy Field, which is just east of the Golden Gate Bridge. After checking in our gear and taking a team photo, we prepared for the start. I ran the first mile in 5:15, aided by a slight tail wind. My big concern was the middle of the race, which faces the wind blowing east through the Golden Gate. Last year I felt like I was towing a trailer, but this year the breeze was slight and I didn't slow as much. I finished the 3.5 miles in 20:42, 12 seconds faster than last year.

Following the race we held an S&P awards ceremony at Amici's East Coast Pizza. All participants received medals in various categories.

Male Team: total time 1:40:15

Ian Carroll: 26:29

Paul Dyson: 27:08

Rob Williams: 25:56

Larry Witte: 20:42

Coed Team: total time 2:08:57

Shannon Groff: 34:54

Gabe Petek: 28:55

Le Quach: 37:32

Matt Reining: 27:36

Awards:

Ian Carroll: Most Improved Player, based on his participation this year after having to miss last year's race due to a conflict.

Paul Dyson: Mr. Consistency, since he placed well in many categories but didn't surpass everyone in any particular one.

Shannon Groff: Katherine Switzer Award, since Shannon was the first woman to sign up and she along with Le were the first women in our office history to participate in the race. Katherine Switzer was the first woman to run the Boston Marathon.

Gabe Petek: Manager of the Year, since six of his direct reports ran the race.

Le Quach: Smallest Foot

Matt Reining: AAA Award, since he was the best predictor of his finishing time.

Rob Williams: Biggest Foot

Our turnout was terrific and enthusiasm was high after the race. Everyone wants to participate next year, and perhaps we'll get a few more to enjoy the event.

Olympian Thoughts

The Summer Olympics were a big event in our house for many reasons. When I was young the Olympics were a big deal. Now with the proliferation of all-sports networks and constant American team sports on television, it's nearly impossible to escape baseball, football, basketball, NASCAR, and Tiger Woods, as if no other sports are worthy of attention. Years ago I could watch ABC's Wide World of Sports, with a lot of sports that you can only see in the Olympics. Now ABC shows basketball during basketball season, and women's basketball in the summer.

The Olympics show non-Americans playing sports, and sports that American networks don't follow. With NBC's heavy coverage and our DVR, we were able to catch a lot of sports that we wouldn't otherwise see. Mandy and I kept telling Maylee that the games were played in China, her home country. This usually kept Maylee's atention as long as we could talk about China, but that would end whenever the action on the TV became too compelling, or we ran out of things to say about China.

We enjoyed the coverage, and thank goodness for the DVR. We were able to record everything and fast-forward through the boring parts. My interest is mostly on the track events, particularly distance running, so I'm sure what I skipped is not the same as the general public. Mandy had a lot of favorite moments, including the razor-close Michael Phelps wins in the 4 X 100 meter freestyle relay and the 100 meter butterfly, and Henry Cejudo's gold medal in wrestling. Maylee enjoyed the gymnastics and diving, asking me, "Daddy, when can I do that?"

Amazing and unwatchable: The biggest disparity in the games wasn't the medals won by the US and Togo, but the quality in the opening and closing ceremonies. Mandy and I were completely riveted by the opening ceremonies, with each segment a masterpiece of coreography and spectacle, highlighting an element of Chinese culture. What made the performances so remarkable was that the delecate and well-timed maneuvers were performed by hundreds at a time. My favorite was the undulating boxes. How could the performers know exactly when to raise and lower themselves to make intricate forms? Amazing. I also likes the tai-chi performers. The precision of their movement and positioning made an artistic exercize form enchanting. I agree with Bob Costas. If there's a trophy for the best opening ceremony, give it to China and retire it.

In contrast the closing ceremonies were the only ones in Olympic history that I can remember being unable to watch. In the ten minutes that we had it on, a London double decker bus drove around the stadium, revealing Jimmy Page playing "Whole Lotta Love", looking like an old hippie, bored out of his mind. I love Led Zeppelin, but I have to question the choice in the song. Why not "It's Been a Long Time"? At least then we wouldn't have to wonder if the singer would go through the orgasmic Robert Plant moans. Just when I thought it couldn't get worse, David Beckham popped out of the bus. Isn't Beckham playing in the MLS? Doesn't he have a game? Did he tell his team, "Hey mates. Sorry about the bloody season we're having and the immense amount of money I'm being paid to end my career while my wife shops. I've got to go to China to kick a football into the crowd. See ya. Good luck staying out of last place." If Beckham is the best athlete the Brits can offer to promote their Olympics--even though he's not one of the top soccer players in England anymore--couldn't the organizers have him do something cool? Remember how in the Athens Olympics an archer shot a flaming arrow into the cauldron to light the torch? Why not have Beckham bend a kerosene-laced ball throuth the Olympic torch into a goal full of fireworks?

Sand in my eyes: I'm sorry, but I couldn't watch beach volleyball. Serve...bump, set, spike. It must be gthe most repetitive sport in the world. Tennis has variety in its rallies, golf is played on different courses, and even real volleyball has a lot more action. I know NBC played countless hours of the competition because the players wear bikinis, but that can only keep my interest for two and a half minutes. Why couldn't NBC show a few points, cut to something else, and come back half an hour later?

Marathon-itis: I was shocked to see the San Francisco Chronicle villify NBC for showing the entire women's and men's marathon, which the paper felt were painfully boring. I recognized a number of the women's competitors, and watched the entire race with close attention. I overheard a non-running female smoker say that she enjoyed watching the women's marathon, and a friend of mine said the same about the men's race. Is it really too much to for the sportwriters at the Chronicle to watch a race that goes less than two and a half hours every four years? They've endured counless hours of pointless Bay Area sports during that time. The women's winner, Constantina Tomescu Dita of Romania, has a history of gambling. She took a big lead halfway through the race and held on, in contrast to other cases where she tanked. It wasn't a riveting race, but one with enough uncertainty to make it worth watching. Back to beach volleyball!

Lighten Up: Jacques Rogge, president of the IOC, said of Usain Bolt's antics that "He has some maturing to do." This was in the midst of Bolt's half-week of the greatest sprinting in history. Bolt broke the world record in the 100 meters without even trying, broke the 200 meter world record a few days later and then was on the Jamaican 4x100 meter relay world record team. Amidst that string of performances, Bolt had the liberty to ham it up, pose, flex, dance and enjoy himself. Setting three track and field sprinting records in a week is unprecedented, so let the guy jump to the heavens. He probably could do it. When Brandy Chastian scored the winning goal on a penalty kick in the Women's World Cup, she ripped off her jersey to show off her sports bra. That moment remains the defining image of women's soccer. She did it after kicking a ball in a goal, something that I could do one out of three times. No way could any of us dream of the week Bolt had.

Hit the Road, Jack: American pole vaulter Jenn Stuczynski did everything possible in winning the silver medal. While the all-time best in the sport, Yelena Isinbayeva of Russia won the event with two jumps, then let the other competitors try to beat her mark while she laid under a blanket on the field. Once everyone else failed, she took three shots at the world record, breaking it on her final attempt. Post-competition interviews revealed that Isinbayeva's biggest fear was winning the gold medal without breaking the world record. Clearly outclassed, Stuczynski should be proud and praised for her second-place finish. Instead, her coach gave condescending praise for taking the silver. She walked away from him. Jenn, keep walking.

Golden Touch: The United States topped all countries with 110 medals, but China ran away with the gold medal crown 51-36 over the US thanks to dominating the diving (7G out of 8 events, 1S, 3B) and gymnastics (9G, 1S, 4B)competitions. The Chinese also won both gold medals in trampoline. The genius of it is that the Chinese have figured out that all three sports are the same. The country moves athletes from its gymnastics program into diving and trampoline. The main difference in each sport is where the athletes land after flipping. China would have won all eight gold medals in diving if its last diver hadn't missed his last dive. China is to diving what Idaho is to potatoes, Milan is to fashion and Japan is to automobiles. We probably won't hear much about the Chinese superstars in diving in 2012. They'll all be replaced with a new crop.

Missed Up: Unlike the Chinese consistency in gymnatics and diving, the US track team had its share of disappointment. Lolo Jones hit the ninth hurdle in the women's 100 meter hurdles to go from first to fourth in about one second, 1,500 meter and 5,000 meter world champion Bernard Lagat failed to medal, no US women medaled in the 100 meters, Sanya Richards faded to third in the women's 400 meters after leading into the homestretch, and with one exception the US distance runners performed to their middle-of-the-road standards despite some reasonable expectations for medals. There were some great moments, especially the US sweep in the men's 400 meters; the US sweep in the men's and women's 4 X 400 meter relays; Shalane Flanagan's bronze in the women's 10,000 meters, which caused Mandy and I to fight back tears; and Stephanie Brown Trafton's gold in the women's discus. The US won 23 track and field medals, than any other country, but the uplifting moments were rare.